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1.
White 03:12
Can’t help being white can’t help being not quite right can’t help trying to fight my destiny Spend most of my life tryin’ not to be an obstacle but on the ledge of privilege there’s no bridge to reality I lose sight of me within the limits of what I can see Just want to be one with humanity Slaving for the clock to get my hourly what they say, money is power It’s like a fantasy trying to stave off debt inside a pyramid designed to limit possibilities Meantime my body’s aching time is dissipating seems my fate is owned someone else is in control who determines where I can and can not go. Oh poor white me living in relative security meanwhile on the other side of town they must fight daily for their place in humanity Though I know life is in accepting with equanimity life must be enough for me and that it must be good enough to just be In the meantime I drop a pebble in the pool of humanity with hope the ripples moves us toward community, equality and empathy and maybe even makes a place for me one with humanity.
2.
A Loofa 03:04
My dermatologist said I should get a loofa and so I got one I use it in the shower to scrub with extra power I love to use my loofa. Come on in the shower and we’ll do a two-for. You scrub my back I’ll scrub your back that’s what friends are for Maybe we’ll scrub something else no need to keep score Don’t look up Don’t look down Keep your eyes on my face Don’t touch this. Don’t touch that. The loofa don’t belong in that place. This is not the place to get flirty We’re here to get clean We’re not here to get dirty I don’t think you’ve done this before Leave the loofa on the ledge, don’t leave it on the floor. I love my loofa You love my loofa too Entertainment was on me. Dinner is on you. Dont’ look up … Loofa, you are my loofa Loofa, loofa, loofa, loofa Loofa, loofa I got your back You got my back Loofa all the time Don’t look up..
3.
Pad Thai 02:53
Pad Thai please give me some Pad Thai please give me some Sitting by the TV and I am so hungry but I don’t wanna go out because I am so lazy But delivery will be too much money so I make my honey use her app while I go take a nap because I am a bad guy who wants Pad Thai. duh God, I’d like a great big bowl full then I would be joyful, eating on the floor Oh how happy it would make me if Pad Thai was delivered to our door. Sitting by the TV and I am so lonely now that she has left me because I am so lazy. I just can’t believe I was such a dummy and I lost my honey for some take out that I did not need to eat because I was a bad guy who wanted Pad Thai. duh P-P-P-Pad Thai P-P-P
4.
I run You hide I crawl You fly I’m brave you’re shy I ask why Where can I find you? Do you look for me too? You laugh I cry Your truth my lie The years fly by don’t know why Where can I find you Do you look for me in you? Show me something new. Tell me what to do. I seek You find I’m coarse you’re fine It’s yours not mine. I’m on time. Where can I find you Do you look for me in you? Tell me what to do. Tell me what to do. I run You hide I seek You find
5.
Falsie 03:35
Hey Yeah, you I’m here singing these four notes over and over and over might not mean nothin’ to you but these days it’s what we do ya I know that I am kind of risky Never gonna be your true love Never gonna be your bestie Never gonna be true But I can be your falsie I can be your falsie Remembering in your Bentley When we did it gently It’s about time to make a cute rhyme song like this can turn on a dime It’s perfect medium if you got nothin’ to say I know what I put you through and sure, I do not deserve you cause I wanna be your boo even though I can never be true like your lashes and hair extensions and certain body parts not to mention I don’t care if they’re imitation they still warm imagination I can be your falsie I can be your falsie I can be your falsie
6.
I, Phone 02:13
I’m so hot with my brand new phone dope in the burb trippin’ on the curb cause I can-not see beyond my giant screen You can always contact me long as I got battery on my phone My mackadocious phone is the smartest thing I own her intelligence is real she knows just how I feel cares more about me than you ever will If I’m not too busy with her I can call you on my phone I am four inches shorter ‘cause I’m always hunchin’ over my phone Please do not intrude on my phone-love interlude I will walk right over you Whatever you do Don’t never ever get between me and my phone
7.
On the Mend 02:55
Every dream ends I came to you not knowing what may be I can’t pretend the things I can’t defend didn’t happen or don’t belong to me Just want to talk but I understand time is a precious commodity No one but me can take responsibility for how things are now Only I can help myself maybe it’s a new start in a new town where no one knows my face, or what I’ve got to live down A lonely road waits for me don’t know what my fate will be thanks for listening I wish you well time heals all wounds so they say Anyway, only time will tell
8.
Rosalie 02:41
Suzy only wanted to sleep with me, but she meant that literally. So I let her sleep in my bed, while I was on the couch with Rosalie instead. We didn’t get much sleeping done, but the things we did sure were fun. Rosalie, Rosalie Our love is so good for be Rosalie, Rosalie nothing fits together like you and me Before Rosalie I never realized I could feel so satisfied. didn’t know I’d ever feel such delight, every day and every single night. Every day, I could not wait. Every night, I would not be late, for Rosalie, Rosalie I’ve never been so happy Rosalie, Rosalie nothing fits together like you and me Things seemed so good with Rosalie So I asked her to marry me Her reaction was not what I expected I did not expect to be rejected She wasn’t ready to commit So she was gone and that was it. Rosalie, Rosalie I’d never been so happy Rosalie, Rosalie must not have not been as good for you as it was for me
9.
Growing up in a small town I knew everyone and they new me. I saw meanness and mercy, poverty and prosperity, avarice and charity. Then I moved to the city, and it was all the same, but no one knew my name. Guess you see what you look for. and what you look for is what you see. You see what you look for. Could be a wall or an open door. Might be less, could be more. You see what you look for. Though life is filled with adversity you can choose to love the diversity Though life can seem to be a mess you may still find happiness Looking in the mirror I see somebody who I like to be Choose what you look for carefully, ‘cause what you look for’s what you see. You see what you look for. Could be a wall or an open door. Might be less, could be more. You see what you look for.

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released March 31, 2021

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Tom Rubenoff - The Rubenoff Project Boston, Massachusetts

This stuff here is my soul scratching messages on the wall of its prison cell.

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